From the pulpit to the tattoo studio, Francis Palmquist finds his true self

CHICAGO, ILL. - By Michael Oboza, Special to GoPride.com

During my final year as a volunteer photojournalist, I made it my intention to help recognize everyday legends across our LGBTQ community.

Thank you, tattoo artist Francis Palmquist, for your time, legacy, and for sharing your art.

In the beginning, it began in the church community.

"Growing up in a very religious Catholic community, being gay wasn't an identity. How I referred to myself was a man dealing with unnatural tendencies. I separated the attraction from who I was as a person; it was a temptation and something to be pushed down and controlled. Dealing with my attraction was a daily battle, and I felt like I was a failure every time that I lusted after a man or dwelt in impure thoughts for any amount of time. I was taught to reject any homosexual thoughts immediately."

"No one in the community gave any indication that they too were dealing with similar thoughts and attractions. The standard was always the religious life, priest, monk, or the father of a family. Being attracted to men made me feel like I was different from everyone. I thought I was always the worst of sinners, even if I was doing a lot of good works."

"I wonder if the turmoil going on in my being would have been alleviated a little if I knew that there was someone else who was going through the same thing. But I kept it all internal, and just like shaking a bottle of Coca-Cola, the inevitable explosion would happen."

Light from within is brighter when one is true to it.

"Coming out to myself and family happened around the same time. I became a priest in that same community, and after only a year and a half, the bottle exploded, and I found myself in a horrible mental state. My whole life and faith came undone, and leaving the priesthood was the only way to save myself from self-destruction."

"Many people think it was a selfish motive that led me to leave the priesthood, but in fact it was my survival instincts. I told my family that I left the priesthood and that I was also gay, and immediately felt a huge pressure off of my shoulders."

"It wasn't only a momentary feeling, but one that has lasted for the past eight years since I left the priesthood. I am far from where my journey is taking me, but I know that I am being honest with myself and not trying to live up to an ideal vision of who I should be."

Another lived experience is often a reminder and lesson learned.

"I try not advise anyone, because I am still walking my own path. I never want anyone to make any decision about themselves or even their faith based on my own life and decisions."

"I can only tell people my story and hope that they know that they aren't alone. There isn't always a good time to make decisions, and sometimes life leads us in a direction that we couldn't plan, but one thing I have learned is to be more patient with myself."

"One thing that I had to learn when I started going to therapy is to remind myself that I am good enough."

"For so long I hated these thoughts and feelings, trying so hard to separate myself from them. I thought that I was horrible and unworthy of love, especially of God's love, but the truth is that I was always good enough as I was and lovable as I was."

"The reason I wanted to become a priest is to reach people and help them. Coming out was an aspect of self-acceptance, and allows me to reach people with the real me. I no longer have to present myself as a holy representative of God, but as I am: Francis."

"As a tattoo artist, I can connect with others, and my openness invites a certain authenticity from my clients. I really am able to connect with them. I think that this is something that can help people: when you aren't pretending, you actually can be vulnerable and have authentic human interactions."

Francis Palmquist's website is stfrancistattoo.com.