No apologies No regrets....

Ask me!

Just Ask

Likes: Good people.

Turn-offs: Don't be a suedo intellectual judgemental sexually frustraded emotionally unstable twat...

Website : myspace.com/MonNtY130



Fear can sometimes be like a drug it can make us do things we never thought we would do if we were sober but are we ever? Everyone is afraid to be loved at some point in their lives to be loved is a feeling of new discovery with another human being. There is no greater feeling, except when you loose that love. A person can't have you and then not have you whenever they want. People don't get to disappear, then come back and skip all the hard stuff to get to the easy part. A relationship isn't enough to make you happy, you're in charge of that. Don't bet your love live on some "potential boyfriend" who knows how many real Boyfriends you've missed being stuck on someone else. Relationships are suppose to get easier over time but being alone never does.

How many times have you opted out of going to the Ballet or a Broadway show for the big game. Shouldn't a relationship be 50/50 instead of just 50/20 in the end how much are you willing to pay. Besides your happiness.
Sometimes in a relationship it's not always about doing the things you love it's about doing things with the person you love. It's never too late for change.

There is always a time after a relationship ends where you feel like you could never love again, you feel lonely,hurt,and ignored. Sooner or later it will feel like everyone around you is moving one hundred miles per hour and you're at a stand still, just hoping someone will stop and see the wreckage. It should seem you, the people running around are too busy with their own pangs to acknowledge yours then you realize one day you were apart of the herd and today you're just the lone sheep. Maybe people come into your life to change you,love you,or just screw you, and still the world keeps spinning and life lives on. end of rant.

Sometimes relationships aren't always about being happy
I mean who is really happy in their relationship all the time.
Especially when you're in one out of obligation or guilt sometimes
the plan you have doesn't match with the plan life already has for you. If you are in a relationship
out of guilt and somehow you have something to feel guilty about. Will you always owe it to your lover
to be a better partner,husband,or boyfriend or is it selfish to want something more than just guilt
between you and your loved one. If you let it sit and simmer all the things that you don't talk about
boil over.
Just think how easy it would be if you could just press a button and whisk away
all the, Drunken fights, and horrid memories that shaped our lives today but
if we go down that path how can we ever grow. Isn't it about change.

Have you ever looked in the mirror and realized you don't recognize yourself anymore.
you say to yourself What am I doing? Why do I put myself in situations that
aren't true to my heart. In the mirror you can see someone reflected back at you through the rose colored glass but it's not you.
The mirror is so foggy all you could see was roses. Maybe I'm not in love with this person today,
maybe I'm in love with the Idea of what we could be.Did I go down the wrong path? Did I choose the right partner? So are we living in a Dream world ?
We all have our own dream world where we think that our relationship should be a certain way and only that way,
or where you try to convince yourself what you're feeling is real.

Times like these remind me of that saying Believing is half the battle.
maybe it's true to life that love can't solve all the problems it takes more than that in a relationship.
Maybe what we get out of life and love is what we put in. So when do we stop dreaming and wake up?
When do we stop seeing roses and start seeing a garden full of life.

Someone once said "Love is all that matters in the end" So is there love for the loveless? Maybe when a relationship ends it's about taking chances, and believing in love even when life has given you every reason not to. No matter what the reputation of your past loves it's the possibility that brings two people together and makes us believe again. There is always one factor that can make the difference when deciding a relationship. Your attitude. So Love does matter in the end but if you put nothing on a spark it wont turn into a fire.

Being in a relationship can some times feel like that moment when you're in the car with your partner and you have the map in your hand, you know where you're going, but some how you still end up lost and you lose site of where you were going. It almost seems like a mystery. Sorta like when you date the guy you want to change it's challenge, frustrating,and time consuming. Getting to a point in a relationship where you feel comfortable in the passengers seat can take years and getting into a relationship where you feel content with where the road leads you can take forever.

This may piss people off but I don't really care.
When it comes to the term "Gay Marriage" I tend to loathe that term so very much. I feel people attach the word the word "Gay" to marriage to make it sound different that it actually is. We should be calling it marriage which it is. I for one don't like being labeled or forced to assimilate into a certain lifestyle people deem normal since normal doesn't exist. Do you want to be defined by your sexuality? Don't you hate it when people introduce you as he Gay friend. Hello this is my Gay friend Rob. Being gay is apart of who I am but it's not all I am. Now believe me I'm not trying to bash marriage for same sex couples I would love to at least have the option to marry the man I love. btw Great song by John Alcorn

You see that's the thing about relationships it's not about what you can get out of one it's about what you put in and if you find someone who puts in all of himself he might just be a keeper

I often wonder about life and people's search for love. How we each look high and low for someone that completes us some one who's unforgettable. Living in the "Gay World" it's always hard to find someone who wont screw you over then again maybe I'm being a little pessimistic. What is with all these men who say they are looking for true love but in reality they aren't looking for someone more so anyone to fill this void they have of not wanting to be alone. It's unfair but it's human.

Fate the Idea that everything in you life happens because it's your destiny. Just when you get a grasp on this crazy world and grown as a person is it because you had to or because it's fate. Maybe It's both. Some people tend to clutch on to this word "we broke up because it was fate". If that's true then who is really in control of your life?
If everything is predestined it makes me wonder why we hurt the people we love most. Can we chalk it all up to Fate it's destiny.

Can we every truly forgive if we can't forget in a relationship what are we fighting for. How can you trust your heart with someone when you can't even trust yourself.

It's better to be alone then to be in a relationship and unhappy. Get to know yourself and you might find that you're fabulous all on your own and you don't need a man to make you happy or complete you. I'm fairly young but there are these moments when I wake up and look to the side of me and just wishing someone was there to hold me.
it's my unseen pain to my optimistic nature. Believing In love is half the battle(cliche I know) but do you trust yourself enough to let someone believe in you.

I am some one looking for true love can't live with out you love the things i hate about you love....

When you're a couple and you try to leave your old single self behind can you really slide into monogamy or is it something your born with in the gay community.

I find that some men feel that they are losing apart of themselves when they've been single for so long enter a relationship it's like the ghost that can't be forgotten or maybe on some subconscious level you wont let it be.

Maybe all this fear of commitment comes from an obsession with sex or or maybe some men fear being committed to because if you are then you're safe that at times can be scarier than being alone.

Men they Open up once every year and then like a open wound they close and the only thing that is left is a scar. A scar of what use to be or what could have been, but don't sit and wonder about the could of's and would of's of life because life my men is too short. Men are like wine bottles it may take 20 something years to pop the cork.

Why is it when your in a relationship with an older men he ask the age old question. What if you find someone younger and hotter than I am. Is that all there is in this so called "Gay World" are we constantly searching for a bigger dick or better body or prettier face, blow job, tighter hole.
Honesty and Monogamy in the gay world doesn't mix sometimes you either get one or the other but on a rare occasion you get both and if that man loves you as much as you love yourself then why leave. Relationships may seem the same from the outside in but what's inside may be different than it seems. So asking that question all the time having it run through your head might cause you to push away the person that you love.

When you're a couple and you try to leave your old single self behind can you really slide into monogamy or is it something your born with in the gay community.

Sometimes you can't say i love you because you've never felt it or you're not sure you even love yourself. Trust in a relationship is a huge deal it's like the titanic in the sea of a relationship you take that way and here comes the iceberg. When is it ok to keep a secret! When your protecting someones feelings from the truth or are you only protecting your own. If you apologize your wrong because well you kept a secret or two you're only looking out for yourself..

3 stages of sorry
1. Apologizing for yourself.
2. Apologizing for someone else.
3. Apologizing because you actually mean what you are saying.

A question I ask myself everyday. Why can't we make people love us like the way we love them? Because then life would be to easy.

"Love is unconditional Love is not something you feel for someone only when they act the way you want them to."
How can we ever get past our past???

Everyone has certain standards for who they want their mate to be, but sometimes we get lost in that and we fall for the person we want them to be..instead of just the person.

What I am after.

I want his love, his commitment,and his respect I want him to be the bravest,kindest,most loving person I have ever met He should be able to give the people around him unconditional love. I wish for moments where he would look at me and the world would go away because he had me in his sight. Be able to give yourself so selflessly to the people you love and never ask for anything in return because you love them. I realize this is a bit much(that's the realist in me talking) but I'll always be a an eternal optimistic and I know there's a reason fairy tales don't exist because sometimes you don't get your happy ever after.

The Ultimate act of love is Sacrifice. Things I know now I wish I knew back then instead of always wondering what could have been..

"Welcome to life things fall apart it's what you do with the pieces that's what defines who you are so start now."

Love is not love which alters when in alteration finds. When life gets hard things change true love remains the same. Heres to finding a love that will not alter.

Why do people hurt other people to get over their own pain HOW selfish..Why do people lie?? Maybe their afraid someone might figure out who they are before they do themselves...


I live in Bolingbrook IL. im not a Silverdaddies supporter, but if you want you can send them to me i can give you my Email address.

"There are two tragedies in life one is to lose your hearts desire the other is to gain it."

..I want a man i can cuddle with and kiss someone who will take care of me. I want a man that i can't breath around when i see him someone who gets me more than anyone. I want to be loved by a man who can turn me into the best homosexual i can possibly be a man who just blows me away everyday(pun intended). I want someone who will pull me under the umbrella and kiss me when the rain falls...but maybe I'm a bit optimistic and a true romantic.

"When life throws you a curve ball throw one back."

Why can't we make people love us like the way we love them.

In the end i just want someone who only wants to be with me someone i can love forever.

Please no Brian Kinney's(if you know who that is thats a big plus)

If you keep on looking for reasons not to be with someone thats all your going to find.

Your Life Path Number is 6

Your purpose in life is to help others

You are very compassionate, and you offer comfort to those around you.
It pains you to see other people hurting, and you do all in your power to help them.
You take on responsibility, and don't mind personal sacrifice. You are the ultimate giver.

In love, you offer warmth and protection to your partner.

You often give too much of yourself, and you rarely put your own needs first.
Emotions tend to rule your decisions too much, especially when it comes to love.
And while taking care of people is great, make sure to give them room to grow on their own.

Just so you guys know I'm not ignoring you.
I tend to leave my profile logged online so if you message me and i don't message back I'm probably not here..

One of my all time favorite songs!

Goodnight My Love-Ella Fitzgerald

Goodnight my love, the tired old moon is descending,
Goodnight my love, my moment with you now is ending.It was so heavenly, holding you close to me,
It will be heavenly to hold you again in a dream,
The stars above have promised to meet us tomorrow,Till then, my love, how dreary the new day will seem,So for the present dear, we'll have to part,Sleep tight my love, goodnight my love,Remember that you're my sweetheart.

Real love when you find it doesn't look like anything you expect it to.


Favorite movies

The Perfect Score,The 40 Year Old Virgin,Old School,Domino,The Matrix,Unleashed,Scream One,Schindlers List,Brokeback mountain,Closer,Crash

Favorite music

3 Doors Down, Alicia Keys, Ataris, The Beatles, Blondie, Brand New, Chevelle, Damien Rice, Dave Matthews Band, ,Eminem, Fall Out Boy, Frank Sinatra, Gavin DeGraw, Get Up Kids, Goo Goo Dolls, Green Day, Guns N Roses, Hoobastank, Hootie and the Blowfish, India Arie, Jack's Mannequin, John Mayer, Kanye West, ,Lifehouse,Linkin Park,Lucky Boys Confusion, , and Maroon 5, Michael Buble,The Offspring, OK GO, Switchfoot, Taking Back Sunday, The Temptaions, Weezer, Yellow Card,sigur ros, tegan and sara,the bravery, stray's don't sleep,others..

Favorite food

French toast,umm more french toast did i metion i love French Toast

Favorite TV shows

Queer As Folk, Sex and the City, Heroes,Californacation,Nip Tuck,Pushing Daises, Ugly Betty,Life,Anything Law and Order especially SPVU,Veronica Mars, Buffy The Vampire Slayer

Connections (7)