There were definitely more people at The Pitstop memorial for Tristan than were at the funeral. Brad couldn't help wonder if it people hadn't weaseled their way in just for free drinks.
"I hardly knew him, but I still feel bad," Tyler said, coming back with two beers.
"I barely remember him from when Becka lived with Charlie," Brad said, loosening his tie. "I just remember they were out a lot. Sometimes, Tristan would be crashed on the couch when we'd wake up in the morning."
"Can I tell you something I've never told anyone?"
"
Should I have a mic on so you can accidentally tell the whole bar?" Brad joked.
"Har," said Tyler.
"Go ahead."
"I met Tristan
my first night in Boystown. I was just off the bus, scared out of my mind, with hardly any money in my pocket. I was trying to get to know people, make a friend. I met him, he pulled this whole cutsie 'buy me a drink' and then disappeared. Then he sent his friends to pull the same thing on me. That bummed me out so bad. Like, was that what gay life was all about? I remember seeing him with Charlie and thinking how shallow he was and how most of the guys in Boystown I encountered were like him and it just bothered me."
"Scene queens Becka used to call them."
"But then he was there for Charlie when he was in his coma. Nothing to really gain from it, he was there because he was Charlie's friend."
"And now that he's dead, you feel bad that he's just a footnote in your life."
Tyler sipped his beer. "Yeah."
"Like it or not, we all are. I've only ever been Becka's fiancé. Charlie's friend. Pat and Marys kid. That's one of the biggest things I found out after Becka and I broke up: I've only been someone in relation to someone else."
"So you're Tyler's... what... ?"
"Can I just be me for a minute? I haven't even figured that part out yet. Am I gay am I bi? I don't know dude."
"For sure," Tyler said, kissing him, not sure whether he should be relieved or disappointed.
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