Dear Princess Darby,
I am a man who was never attracted to men.
But about a year ago I had a encounter with a girl who turned out to have a little extra. But when I found out I was freaked out but I was also interested.
This woman was very attractive and I didn't care, it actually excited me and did things I would never think of doing.
I know I'm not gay and am not attracted to men at all but I can't get it out of my mind, but I also don't have the guts to try again.
Now every time I am with woman I have a little hope that the same thing will happen, I have no idea what is going on with me.
I want to try again to see if this I what I really want or just some crazy night that I let go. I am all turned around inside, what should I do?
Scared But Eager
Dear Scared But Eager,
Your letter reminded me of the movie "The Crying Game". This drama had the elements of attraction, emotion, denial, desire, and conflict. But your life isn't a movie. And, the characters are real people.
Since it's been a year since your encounter with your "little extra" date, what have you been up to? You obviously made a decision and acted on it. Although I'm curious how you can hope that the same situaltion will happen again but not be aware of who you are with?
I suggest you see a sex therapist and discuss your feelings and experiences. Perhaps there is more happening here than you suspect.
In the iterim, if you are dating or in a relationship with straight women, I would be advise them of your life style and preferences.
Today, most women are upfront. They either date for fun or with a strong intention of marrying. Be fair, be careful, and be honest. No one likes surprises where their health and hearts are concerned.
Be careful for what you are looking for. It could turn out the "little extra" in your package may be enjoyable, but not returnable!
Happy Holidays!
Princess Darby
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