June 15, 2004
Help! Am I too ugly or too small?
BY Dave ("Care Bear")
Yes, it's possible to be too ugly and have too small of a dick to be able to date a guy (or a girl, for that matter). Anything is possible, after all, but that doesn’t mean that it’s probable or true. The real question is are you too ugly and packing too little to get dates? Having never seen you (or it), I honestly can't say for sure, but I highly doubt it and would be willing to wager that there is a man (or men) out there for you.
Don't get me wrong, we live in a world with very definite beauty (and size) standards that we are all held up against and of which many of us fall far short. But for every rule, there is an exception, and for every ten (or ten million) men that lust after Brad Pitt, there is one that is hot for Strom Thurmond.
Your looks and cock size may mean that you have to search for that one-in-ten million guy, and that's certainly no easy task, but you're lucky enough to live in the age of the internet, a place where anything you can imagine no matter how uncommon or crazy has it's own website/chat room/mailing list. Get your butt online and do some serious searching for websites, etcetera, that are geared toward "unusual" looks and small cocks.
In case you're new to all of this, a good search engine is http://www.google.com, and both groups.yahoo.com and groups.msn.com are good places to look for mailing lists/groups on a wide range of topics. A quick search I did ("small cocks" on Google), turned up an MSN group called, "Getting through life with a small penis" found at http://groups.msn.com/Gettingthroughlifewithasmallpenis
I have no idea how seriously they address the topic or if it will help you get a date, but it certainly seems like a good place to start. And speaking of getting off to a good start, you might want to tell the next guy that says you are too ugly or too small to get a date to eat shit.
I could go on and on about putting your best foot forward and self-love and the importance of what's on the inside over what's on the outside, but that's for another, much nicer column. Suffice it to say, the sooner you stop buying into dumb crap like that, the sooner it will stop being true.
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