Phil Burress urged Rob Portman to reject his gay son
Sat. March 16, 2013 7:30 AM by Carlos Santoscoy
Phil Burress, president of Citizens for Community Values, says he discussed the issue of gay marriage with Ohio Senator Rob Portman.
In an email to supporters, Burress said Portman called him Thursday night for advice on the issue.
On Friday, Portman, a Republican, announced that he had reversed course on the issue. He credited his son's recent coming out for changing his heart.
"I believe all of our sons and daughters ought to have the same opportunity to experience the joy and stability of marriage," Portman wrote.
(Related: Senator Rob Portman reverses course on gay marriage.)
Burress, whose organization led the campaign to approve Ohio's constitutional amendment which prevents the state from recognizing any relationship other than a heterosexual marriage, said in his email that he told Portman that he and his wife would pray for his son to become heterosexual.
"I explained to Rob that my wife and I served on the board of an organization that saw thousands of homosexual men and women walk away from that behavior, many who went on to a natural marriage and were also blessed with children," Burress wrote. "I told him we would pray that some day his son would as well."
Burress continued: "Not every family would make the same decision Rob did. Many parents, because of their deep and abiding love for their child, would not accept and embrace their child's decision regarding homosexuality. My wife and I believe that if you love someone you tell them the truth. They may not like what they hear, but you love them anyway."
Below is Burress' complete email.
I met Rob Portman before he went to Congress in 1993. I consider Rob and his wife Jane to be good friends and pray for them as they work their way through the difficult situation as parents of having a son reveal his same-sex attraction.
Rob called me Thursday night at 9:00 p.m. to share about his situation and the position he was taking concerning his son and same-sex marriage.
I believe Rob will understand why, as much as I might ache for my friend and the painful emotional struggle of his son's identification as gay, that it does not change why I still strongly support natural marriage as only between a man and a woman.
I explained to Rob that my wife and I served on the board of an organization that saw thousands of homosexual men and women walk away from that behavior, many who went on to a natural marriage and were also blessed with children. I told him we would pray that some day his son would as well.
For Rob, it appears his beliefs on same-sex marriage changed when it became personal. I understand that. Yet it does not change the truth that homosexuality is not innate. The evidence of that is in the lives of so many today that live free of unwanted same sex attraction.
Many Ohioans know family members and friends who identify as homosexual. Yet an overwhelming number of Ohioans also voted to affirm marriage as only between one man and one woman. They didn't do so out of some misplaced hatred or fear of homosexuality. Like my wife and I, they understood the importance of a married mother and father in the life of children. They understood that a mother and father each bring unique and character shaping attributes to a child's life. The simple truth is that a mother cares for and nurtures a child in a way a father just can't. In the same way, a father cares for and relates to a child in the way a mother can't. That is the inescapable truth of the debate Rob has now ignited in Ohio over same sex marriage.
Not every family would make the same decision Rob did. Many parents, because of their deep and abiding love for their child, would not accept and embrace their child's decision regarding homosexuality. My wife and I believe that if you love someone you tell them the truth. They may not like what they hear, but you love them anyway.
The question now is not whether parents love their children when they identify as gay. It is whether Ohioans will allow the personal experience of one high-profile family to sway its deeply held belief in the original purpose and meaning of marriage.
In an email to supporters, Burress said Portman called him Thursday night for advice on the issue.
On Friday, Portman, a Republican, announced that he had reversed course on the issue. He credited his son's recent coming out for changing his heart.
"I believe all of our sons and daughters ought to have the same opportunity to experience the joy and stability of marriage," Portman wrote.
(Related: Senator Rob Portman reverses course on gay marriage.)
Burress, whose organization led the campaign to approve Ohio's constitutional amendment which prevents the state from recognizing any relationship other than a heterosexual marriage, said in his email that he told Portman that he and his wife would pray for his son to become heterosexual.
"I explained to Rob that my wife and I served on the board of an organization that saw thousands of homosexual men and women walk away from that behavior, many who went on to a natural marriage and were also blessed with children," Burress wrote. "I told him we would pray that some day his son would as well."
Burress continued: "Not every family would make the same decision Rob did. Many parents, because of their deep and abiding love for their child, would not accept and embrace their child's decision regarding homosexuality. My wife and I believe that if you love someone you tell them the truth. They may not like what they hear, but you love them anyway."
Below is Burress' complete email.
I met Rob Portman before he went to Congress in 1993. I consider Rob and his wife Jane to be good friends and pray for them as they work their way through the difficult situation as parents of having a son reveal his same-sex attraction.
Rob called me Thursday night at 9:00 p.m. to share about his situation and the position he was taking concerning his son and same-sex marriage.
I believe Rob will understand why, as much as I might ache for my friend and the painful emotional struggle of his son's identification as gay, that it does not change why I still strongly support natural marriage as only between a man and a woman.
I explained to Rob that my wife and I served on the board of an organization that saw thousands of homosexual men and women walk away from that behavior, many who went on to a natural marriage and were also blessed with children. I told him we would pray that some day his son would as well.
For Rob, it appears his beliefs on same-sex marriage changed when it became personal. I understand that. Yet it does not change the truth that homosexuality is not innate. The evidence of that is in the lives of so many today that live free of unwanted same sex attraction.
Many Ohioans know family members and friends who identify as homosexual. Yet an overwhelming number of Ohioans also voted to affirm marriage as only between one man and one woman. They didn't do so out of some misplaced hatred or fear of homosexuality. Like my wife and I, they understood the importance of a married mother and father in the life of children. They understood that a mother and father each bring unique and character shaping attributes to a child's life. The simple truth is that a mother cares for and nurtures a child in a way a father just can't. In the same way, a father cares for and relates to a child in the way a mother can't. That is the inescapable truth of the debate Rob has now ignited in Ohio over same sex marriage.
Not every family would make the same decision Rob did. Many parents, because of their deep and abiding love for their child, would not accept and embrace their child's decision regarding homosexuality. My wife and I believe that if you love someone you tell them the truth. They may not like what they hear, but you love them anyway.
The question now is not whether parents love their children when they identify as gay. It is whether Ohioans will allow the personal experience of one high-profile family to sway its deeply held belief in the original purpose and meaning of marriage.
Article provided in partnership with On Top Magazine