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Well what to say.... In just Three days time I will be moveing to a new city. As we all know I am origenaly form the beutiful city of Chicago. Now I will be moveing to our siter city San Diego, California. I am afraid and a little worried that every one wont be as hospitable as Chicago is. One thing is certend I will make it to their pride and enjoy my self. I think that is a gret way to be welcomed to a new city by celebrating us, being who you are no matter what. Me being in the military many people ask me how is it that you do it, being gay and all? Well is not that different then any other job. I love my country that has given me so much, then why not go out there and fight not only for the straigh people but for thoes that are just like me.. I love being gay and the fact that I can fight for our freedom. I am proud to be an American.... but most of all I am proud to be part of such great community like the gay community. I fight for all of you guys!!!!!

Well here it is i had plans on goint o this year Chicago Pide parade and it seems like it not going ot happe do the fact taht my career does not alow it. i was suppost to fly out of Japn into Chicago om the 23 of this month but to my luck my fly was changed to next week...... IT SUCKS .....and not in a good way but just like me i always look at the silver line.... i will miss my home town pride celebration but i will make it up in San Diego California this year at their pride celebration i wll party like is 1999 with my fellow family men... to bad my boyfriend wont be there do the fact that he will be fighting for our country in Iraq... may God be with him and I will wait for you to you come back !!!!

Wow.... It only been a month seen my "Boyfriend" been gone and now he is due back in a week. You know with my carrer it hard to find that special some one in your life. This guy to me is the greates thing that has happen to me for many reasson. I am a verry lovable person, someone who get attached verry quickly, he is that same way. The first time we saw each othere i dint think there was anyhitng there for one major reasson he was dateing my bestfriend ..... (I know what your thinking and it nothing like that let me finish and you will see) Well we hong out a couple of times as agroup and the more time we spend together the more we got use to each other. Well it came a time when my Bestfriend had to have a surgery done and me as a great friend stud by him and help him out, well i noticed that he was being some what of a bitch to his boyfriend. I keeped asking him why he was treating him that way and he dint want to tell me the reasson why. well one day i was able to get it out of him. He had told me that his boyfriend had a problem more of an addiction, I look at him as he was saying all this thing about him like if he was to be some sick person who wasnt good enough to even live. I told him that insted of judgeing him and pushing him away he should be helpiing get over this. A couple of days later the boyfriend came up to me and told me that he was going to end thing with my friend, i told him not to, to hold on , that it was just a face that my friend was going thru. I look at him and told him that i knew. He looked at me expecting for me to judge him and start to tell him that it was wrong, But insted i huged him and told him that i would not leave him and will help him get thru it, because now hes my friend. Well days went by and me and him got alot closer. i got to know the real him, and started to find out how he really was. My friend started to notice that i was hangin out with his ex to much. He asked me if i like him and i told him yes, he started to scream at me and tell me how bad of a freind and whore i was for dateing his ex. I dint take it personaly i knew that it was just hard for him. Well time went on by and me and this guy keeped getting closer. I was starting to get attached to him. we had spoken about it and had decited not to do it just be friends and enjoy each others company, well that dint last long. It kinda cute actualy , one day we where seating down talking and i was telling him about this guy that i know that is extremly hot, well he look at me and said " You know I dont know why am filling jelouce of this guy for" all i could do was smile. Later on that same day we went out to the bar with a couple of friends. Well one of my frinds comes up to me and tell me that Troy was asking about the guy that i had spoken to him about earler. He was asking every one if the guy that i though was hot was hotter then he was. i thought that was the cutes thing ever. Well back to the story he had to leave for a few day to San Diego so we decided to spend that weekend together and we did. It was the happiest weekend i've ever had. There was one moment that just let me know how much he realy cared. On the last day right before he left to the airport he started to walk to the door and then just stop and look at me with this sad look on his face letting me know that he dint want to leave, all i could do was run to him and hug him. The look he gave me that day is stil in my mind like it was yesterday.

the time for him to come back is almost here and i cant wait to see him. They say that time apart brakes you but i think it made what we fill for each other stronger.

well i havent wrote in a while i just though i give you guys an uptade on my life. well Am still in Japan ..... OMG it seem like ill never leave this island. well i will leave in july and will spand a month or so in chicago with my family and freinds. Cant wait to actualy party in a normal size club, the clubs here if you can call them that are small very small...... well it might be cus japaness are small as well ....lol well any ways once my vacation is over i will leave to california wow... well my boyfriend at this time is in san diego hes on some tratning and he'll be back in three weeks or so... i miss him so much we both leave this island at the same time so hope fully he'll go with me to chicago to meet my family. well think that a pretty good update ill keep you posted

It seems like for ever sence you been gone. To think that you being away hurts my heart but to think that you will soon be in my arms bring joy to my soul. There one thing that has been painted in my mind, one singel moment that i will never for get. A moment that showed me how much you realy cared. That moment you grabed the handel to leave you stoped and turned and looked at me gave a look that just made me jump out of bed and run to you, a look that no has ever given me before. Your eyes where glowing your face red as it can be. I saw the sadness in your eyes. My heart started to beat faster and faster as i ran to you. You droped your bags and huged me. You held on to me so thigh. I felt as your heart and mine beat as one. God know I wanted to cry so bad. You kissed me and said to me " I am going to miss you '' I looked at you as smile and said " Its only for a little while ".Leting you go I looked at you trying to capture every detail of you in my mind to remeber you at the moment just the way it was. As you walked out the door felt my hear stop, I fell back in bed closed my eyes and just look at that mental picture of you. Five minutes pass and it seemed like you ad been gone for years. Never have I felt this way for no one. This deosnt compare to anyhting I felt before. I will close my eyes every time I miss you and look at the mental picture of you. Your face, your eyes. your beautiful smile. Till the day I see you again you will be in my heart.